Generation Why?-Because-It's-There

Ask a few people over thirty-five about the creature known as the Modern Teenager, and a couple of themes are likely to appear; the stereotype seems to involve a sense of entitlement, and a shunning of unnecessary motion - with a distinct definition of “unnecessary”. Certainly the word “adventurous” doesn't come up much, unless it's referencing a recent purchase for the Wii. Two teens have been in the news recently for bucking this trend, possibly doing their generation a great disservice in the process.

Firstly, Jessica Watson's around-the-world sail concluded. I must admit, when the sixteen-year-old took off, I agreed with the gale of commentators who were proclaiming her to be a more telegenic Tony Bullimore: a recue mission waiting to happen. When her craft collided with a freighter during a test-sail, I was eye-rolling and eyebrow-arching to an Olympic standard, ready to add my voice to the chorus demanding that her parents contribute to the Navy's costs of plucking her out of the ocean. However, Watson has responded to the dangers, difficulties and doubts with a resounding “whateva.”

Adding to this, American Jordan Romero is planning to be the first thirteen-year-old up Everest. The urge to scoff is almost irresistable – not only is he just barely a teenager, but an American! Surely this is just a more macho version of the same genetic disorder that created children's pageants! In my case, the scoffing lasted just long enough to discover that when it comes to collecting views from the top of each continent's highest peak, Romero has already pocketed the other six.

What Jess and Jordan may not realise, however, is that their efforts are a weapon, useable by parents everywhere. Adolescents around the world will be hearing either or both of these tales, finishing with “...and you can't even clean your room!” As you read these words, Facebook statuses are going unupdated, and iPods sit dormant, as youths suffer from comparisons to these two intrepid kids. When I look back at myself age sixteen, the assessment is no prettier; I would fend off physical activity by brandishing my Ventolin like a crucifix against vampires. At thirteen, I was as motivated as a doona, as adventurous as tupperware, and as co-ordinated as a drunken Labrador in clogs. At ten, the same age that Romero scaled Mt Kilimanjaro, I'd need oxygen and sherpas to climb the monkey bars... assuming that I had time to set up base camp before recess ended.

So, let us congratulate Jessica as she discovers that she can't leave her sea-legs on the boat, wish Jordan well in his attempt at the top of the world, and realise two things – generalisations are always going to sell some people short, and when compared to the best of our generation, most of us are going to look a tad shiftless. And, if you listen carefully, you might hear the following plaintive cry across the night breeze...


“Aw MUUuuUM, I'll climb Everest TOMORROWuh!”